Your tribe

‘We can’t choose our family but we can choose our friends’. Isn’t that how the saying goes, or something close to that? I could argue that we can indeed choose our family, depending on how you want to define family, but that’s not the point of today’s post 😊 Rather, it’s about choosing our friends, our tribe.

Some friends need more from us than we do from them, and that’s ok. Our purpose here in life is not to just ‘get’ but to ‘give’ too. With some people in our lives, we’re going to give more of ourselves than we’re possibly ever going to get from them. But you know what? There are other people in our lives who are going to give us more than we give in return.

Can you identify those in your circle who fit either description? I’m betting there is a mix!

We need both types. Those who help us become better and stronger versions of ourselves, build us up, at times hold us up when we need it, support us, and kick ass when we need that too! But the great thing is, we also get a chance to BE that type of person for others! And they in turn become that for others. It kind of reminds me of ripples in a pond. Perception can be a funny thing. Up close, it might seem like some friendships are more one-sided, but in the overall picture, the balance is perfect.

As long as your chosen friendships are nurturing and good for you, the amount of give and take does not need to be equal. But they do, or should be a source of joy and love on both sides.

Getting back to the point of today’s post, when choosing our friends, or our tribe, those we spend the most time with, we want to choose people who inspire us, encourage us, and help us become more of who we are. This other saying, ‘you’re the average of the five people you spend the most time with’ is so true! Spend it with the do-er’s and thinkers and you’ll be one too; spend it with the complainers and nay-sayers and that’s who you’ll become.

So, on your journey of creating your most awesome life, know what kind of person you want to be, and choose who you spend most of your time with accordingly. Be mindful of your tribe.

I can guarantee that this one thing can change your life dramatically!

Your life, your journey

How many of us live our lives unintentionally? Or we live our lives according to what society dictates. We conform to what our parents want for us, or to be like our friends. We model our lives after the ‘ideal’ even if it doesn’t make us happy. You know…following the career path that makes our life look good even though we force our way through each day, screaming on the inside but plastering a fake happy look on the outside. Or worse, slowly dying inside. Creating huge sums of debt to be like other people. To have what they have. Yep, including that debt!  Living one day after another, without really thinking about why we’re here, if there is more to living than just existing.  I wonder how many of those people we admire are feeling the same disillusion, the same emptiness, the same feeling of ‘there just has to be more to life’?

I can totally relate to this. All of this. To living a life that was unauthentic to me.

What does that even mean? How can you tell?

Authentic means not false or copied; genuine, real. True to one’s own personality, spirit or character.

So, is your life true to you, to your character, to your wants and desires? Or are you living like I was, unauthentically?

Close your eyes and think of your ideal life. What does it look like? Where are you living? What are you doing? Who else is in there?

Now open your eyes. What would it take to get there, to create that life? It’s a process, not something that’s going to happen all at once and immediately, but a journey. One I’ve been on for a number of years now and continue to grow along. The journey is forever changing, adapting, at times exciting, at times down right scary! But it’s me, totally me, and my journey. And I’m so happy to be here!

I welcome you to join me! Let me know what steps you’re taking along your own journey!