Procrastination at its finest

I can’t stick with a schedule.

I love schedules! I love organization, in fact clutter and operating without direction or a plan just irks me! I love list making, I love crossing things off that list, I love planning, I love goal setting, all of those things! But sticking with a schedule? I fall off the organized people bandwagon time after time.

Why??

Does anyone else struggle with this?

By nature, and at heart I’m an organizer; I could create and plan forever. I am so good at helping people create a vision and devise a plan to make their visions a reality.

And right there I think I hit the nail on the head.

Setting goals and making plans is what I’m really good at and what I thoroughly enjoy doing. But then the work of doing actually becomes my clients’ work. Their tasks.

I support them, give them feedback, suggestions and ideas, and accountability, but the actual doing is their stuff.

Meanwhile, I’m left with my own schedule full of things I need to do, should be doing. And I resist, oh how I resist!

The other thing I’m really good at – Procrastination! And definitely with a capital P 😊

I can always find something to do that will interrupt my schedule or put a kibosh on it completely, even something I don’t really enjoy doing, like folding laundry or vacuuming, or running errands.

The weird part now that I think about it – I’m choosing to spend my time on activities I don’t really enjoy instead of on things I do enjoy. The things in my schedule that I should be doing are all things I like doing; I love my business and everything about it!

So. What to do?

There are all sorts of articles on fighting procrastination and believe me, I’ve read plenty! Hell, I even teach overcoming procrastination in my time management workshops!

I can try to implement any of those tips and for awhile they’ll work – and then I’ll slip back into procrastinating.

Am I just a rebel at heart and refuse to be ruled by a schedule? I don’t think so, I love routine.

So, what is it? Why do I balk at following the same directions I give my clients??

What about you? If you’re a Master Procrastinator as I am, what do you do to keep yourself to a schedule?

I would sooooooo love to hear from you!

I lost my way

I lost my way.

I took a detour that I thought was the right path, got caught up in the bright lights and whirlwind and then realized I was lost. I took the wrong turn. Or maybe it was the right turn at that point, but I stayed too long on that path.

After a long while I made my way back to the right path. Was it starting over? I don’t think so. I definitely saw some interesting sights along the way and learned a ton! Some of it I used back on the right path, some of it was learned in order to grow. But it’s all good! I promise!

This path I refer to is my working life. My job. My business.

When my world got turned upside down and inside out in 2011, I wasn’t even able to function. At least I didn’t think I was. But as a single mom with kids to support and a house to maintain, somehow, I did. You know that saying, one day at a time? Screw that, I was surviving ten minutes at a time. Literally. I just had to make it for another ten minutes. Then another. And another. Keep going. You can do it. It’s only ten minutes. Breathe. Ten minutes.

I was almost three years into my business.

I was helping people be the best versions of themselves, creating the lives they wanted, setting amazing goals and making concrete and deliberate plans to achieve those goals; step by step we got there.

I spent my non-client days researching and devising new ways to help; developing new programs to streamline the learning and the mind shifts needed to make big changes.

Then my life changed and the ten minutes at a time began.

I don’t know how I got so deep onto another path, but eventually I found myself working on someone else’s dream. While still working in my business I was actually working for someone else. On their dream. Not like the coaching I was doing before but doing admin work to help them out.

Wait. What?? How the hell did that happen? When did that happen? How on earth did I lose MY way? When did I let go of my vision, my goal, MY DREAM???

At the time it was the right turn and I still believe that. I needed to create an income for my family. In my time of intense emotional pain and inability to function fully, I needed a way to survive financially that really didn’t require a lot of ‘business running’ until I healed. I needed an easy way to continue to make money.

But my error was staying on that path for far longer than was needed. To be caught up in working on someone else’s dream and on their business.

I forgot to check in with what made me happy.

Or maybe I got comfortable being numb. Whatever it was, when the pain subsided and the numbness went away, I didn’t like the path I was on. It was the wrong one. It wasn’t me.

There are times along our journey when we’re required to put our dreams on hold, like working at a job that pays the bills but does not nourish our souls, but don’t forget those dreams! Don’t give up on them! And if it takes a little longer to get there, that’s ok. It’s part of the journey.

If you’re finding yourself on a path that doesn’t resonate with who you are, or it doesn’t support your dream and nourish your soul, take a moment to figure out what path you should be on, and find a way to get there. Learn what you can from the one you’re on but start moving in another direction. You’ll find your way.

I was lost. But not anymore. I’m back on the right path of my journey.

What about you? Have you taken an unexpected detour for one reason or another? Did you get back on the right path? What helped you get back on track? What have you learned that will continue to help you as you move forward?

What advice would you share with others who are still off track? I’d love to hear your stories!

Your tribe

‘We can’t choose our family but we can choose our friends’. Isn’t that how the saying goes, or something close to that? I could argue that we can indeed choose our family, depending on how you want to define family, but that’s not the point of today’s post 😊 Rather, it’s about choosing our friends, our tribe.

Some friends need more from us than we do from them, and that’s ok. Our purpose here in life is not to just ‘get’ but to ‘give’ too. With some people in our lives, we’re going to give more of ourselves than we’re possibly ever going to get from them. But you know what? There are other people in our lives who are going to give us more than we give in return.

Can you identify those in your circle who fit either description? I’m betting there is a mix!

We need both types. Those who help us become better and stronger versions of ourselves, build us up, at times hold us up when we need it, support us, and kick ass when we need that too! But the great thing is, we also get a chance to BE that type of person for others! And they in turn become that for others. It kind of reminds me of ripples in a pond. Perception can be a funny thing. Up close, it might seem like some friendships are more one-sided, but in the overall picture, the balance is perfect.

As long as your chosen friendships are nurturing and good for you, the amount of give and take does not need to be equal. But they do, or should be a source of joy and love on both sides.

Getting back to the point of today’s post, when choosing our friends, or our tribe, those we spend the most time with, we want to choose people who inspire us, encourage us, and help us become more of who we are. This other saying, ‘you’re the average of the five people you spend the most time with’ is so true! Spend it with the do-er’s and thinkers and you’ll be one too; spend it with the complainers and nay-sayers and that’s who you’ll become.

So, on your journey of creating your most awesome life, know what kind of person you want to be, and choose who you spend most of your time with accordingly. Be mindful of your tribe.

I can guarantee that this one thing can change your life dramatically!

Your life, your journey

How many of us live our lives unintentionally? Or we live our lives according to what society dictates. We conform to what our parents want for us, or to be like our friends. We model our lives after the ‘ideal’ even if it doesn’t make us happy. You know…following the career path that makes our life look good even though we force our way through each day, screaming on the inside but plastering a fake happy look on the outside. Or worse, slowly dying inside. Creating huge sums of debt to be like other people. To have what they have. Yep, including that debt!  Living one day after another, without really thinking about why we’re here, if there is more to living than just existing.  I wonder how many of those people we admire are feeling the same disillusion, the same emptiness, the same feeling of ‘there just has to be more to life’?

I can totally relate to this. All of this. To living a life that was unauthentic to me.

What does that even mean? How can you tell?

Authentic means not false or copied; genuine, real. True to one’s own personality, spirit or character.

So, is your life true to you, to your character, to your wants and desires? Or are you living like I was, unauthentically?

Close your eyes and think of your ideal life. What does it look like? Where are you living? What are you doing? Who else is in there?

Now open your eyes. What would it take to get there, to create that life? It’s a process, not something that’s going to happen all at once and immediately, but a journey. One I’ve been on for a number of years now and continue to grow along. The journey is forever changing, adapting, at times exciting, at times down right scary! But it’s me, totally me, and my journey. And I’m so happy to be here!

I welcome you to join me! Let me know what steps you’re taking along your own journey!